We have rote responses to many questions. We talk about life’s priorities this way. Every discussion goes something like, “Well… duh… I live for Jesus, my wife, and family… who doesn’t?” Maybe we deserve a little pat on the back for at least knowing what we should say.
Did you know that although we say our priorities are following Jesus, our spouse, and our family, we rarely live that way? Of course you knew that… Did you know that our reasons are often our work, finances, and general busyness? You knew that too…
Debunking The Myths:
- Do you really believe your spouse and family are more important than your professional success? We all say it but often times when we truly get honest about it we find some tension.
- If your work is keeping you from participating in a biblical manner at home, what would happen if you had a conversation with your supervisor about creating some balance? (I know what you’re thinking. Read the next question).
- If your current position demands more from you than your priorities (biblical responsibilities) allow, what would happen if you looked for another job that would permit faithfulness at home? (I know… money… we’ll get there.)
- Do you really believe your spouse and family are more important than the square footage of your home, your car’s make and model, your cable/satellite package, and personal trainer fees?
- If money is the reason your practical priorities do not look like your spoken priorities then cut off the financial outflow and downsize. These financial commitments are removing you from having the lasting impact on your home that is needed for a healthy marriage and children.
- Let’s affirm a basic idea. A family that makes choices to live with much less so that they can invest appropriately in each other will have a legacy. A family that has everything today but does not seize quantity time together will be the broken home with a splintered legacy.
- Do you really believe your spouse and family are more important than your child’s ability to play a sport, an instrument, or excel in any activity?
- If there are ongoing activities almost every night for your children which steal the opportunity for your family to have any quantity time, then stop the activity. “But, it is so good for my kids” you will probably say. It is good for them but it pales in comparison to spending time with you.
- If you have a ‘christian’ group meeting every night which pulls you away from your family, then you need to stop attending some of them. Many people have married their reputation at the church while divorcing their family at home.
Let’s be honest enough to affirm that our lives are not really as out-of-control as we often portray. Let me encourage all of us (myself included) in some very specific ways: our work, finances, activities, even church activities, and children’s activities are NOT more important than our relationship with Jesus, our spouse, and our family. Further, they are all a product of our decisions and demonstrated values.
Questions: Do your demonstrated priorities match your spoken priorities? Have you set boundaries or made changes to your life so that you can faithfully pursue Jesus and invest quantity time in your home?